who am i??

who am i??i dun even noe myself??
quite sad...i dun und myself...
my frens oso...act..u guys c me smiling at u...like no worries..
act..im not!!i juz pretend ntg...
dis happen when i was in form2...my father ran away..left me,my mom n my bro...
u noe dat time...v no place 2 stay..so v temporally stay at my grandma's hse.
dat time...reli very difficult..
cz dat not our own hse...is my 2 aunties place..thay use 2 stay at dat hse since my grandma was pass awy..
there got 3 cars...but oly 1 cover parking lot.dat time...my aunties oways rebut dat parking lot wif us..
nvm...v give them...
den they keep find something n argue wif us...
they treat us so so so unkind..very sad...dis all my father's fault!!!
and when v buy our own hse..n when v moved..oly they started 2 treat us nice abit..y??may i noe??
my father oways gv me hope...den??all wat he gv...sure got some rules n regulations v nid 2 fulfill..
wat 4??
all goods go 2 him bad 2 us??wat 4 giving me hope??den pour me cold water??
i hate dis...n now i cant trust ppl easily...n i cant even trust men...i dunno wat they think..
sometime i feel im lonely... i scare i been cheat by my frens...i dunno wat they think...
i scare i use my heart 2 fren wif them but they didn't..how??
im lost!!!